The First Step

"The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are"

its 4:31 in the morning, been gone through 2 or 3 drafts of post material....still nothing. I try to compose a well and appropriate first post for this blog. At the end I decided to be honest and true to what I posted in this blog.

Should I say my intention or reasons why I put up this blog? Why blogging at first place? It is so 2006. Nowadays people go for Vlog, Video Blogging. I don't know...perhaps I don't have the face for Vlog or Youtube LoL. Similar to many people decided to start blogging is to voice out their opinion...they wanted their opinion to be heard. Me...I want to tell the story of a young man just simply going through his life. Is it that interesting or important to tell? You would not be here if you are not at least curious what I got to tell. hehehe.

Where should I start? at the beginning? at the middle? or start with where I am now as it is still raw and fresh. I am somewhat have mixed feeling of where I am now...not much with confuse with all the feeling and thought that going through in my mind. I am sad what had happened between my ex and I. I have this huge resentment against my ex which I feel I had accumulated over the time when I was with him. Sometimes I feel alone, yet I feel love from my family. It feel that I'm the only one having such problem, yet for sure there are lots of people face the same problem.

LoL don't worry, I won't be just talk about my crushed and wrecked love life.

I am straight bisex guy. for the past years in my life, I found out that I am into guys...as well girls. that means girls and boys make my 'Disco Stick' goes glow hard LoL. I started to notice and realised of such sexual feeling when I was in high school. I do somewhat notice that sexual feeling when I was in primary school specially when x-rated stuff shows in the TV showing. like Aeon Flux, Music Video, B-rated movie, beaver and butthead...and lots. Back then when we had a decorder (similar to cable TV), I heard my dad talk to my mom about the shows in decorder, after midnight there would be an x-rated movies. swear to god, after I heard that...I tried whenever i could to sneak into the TV room and flicked through the TV channel to catch sexy stuff on the TV LoL. lil perv!!!!

It took me years to have the guts to be in a relationship with a guy. when I was in college, i began to shape and gear up for relationships. I wont say much about this this time, I promise you that I would tell you a whole lot more hopefully with details in another post.

I supposed not having enough sleep lately make my mind exhausted easily. I feel like I need to pop up pills just to knock me out just to get me enough sleep.

till next time....

p/s leave comment where and how you stumble upon this blog...much appreciated *insert a wide smiley annoying face* LoL